If I am honest, my opening to this course has been colored by a number of things. Namely, my own blackness. In white spaces, I think too much for “the colored” people. I think of us as coloured people. I do too much in my mind to correct for what I think is the bias of other races while altogether realizing it is my own bias at fault here. I am not here removing the external biases that do exist, yet I am stating the fact that it is hard enough to live while black without adding the over-correction (or over-calculation) that I feel the need to do because of my race.
I want to explain things away. I want people to understand the feelings, thoughts, assertions, and PASSION of my people without feeling the weight of snide remarks, ignore-ance, or mal-adjustment to the race. I want the world to know my insides… our insides… without having to say. Heck! We’re just out here trying to LIVE! To SURVIVE is a great wish… it is the HOPE of a generation, but first… we need to live. Live… in peace.
Is that too much to ask?
YES!
Why?
Because the turmoil exists in my mind more so than anywhere else. I cannot seem to stop my mind from fumbling over what may not even cause another person to stumble. I cannot stop my mind from over-correcting, over-adjustment, over-assuming, over-standing, over-STATING, and really… I’m just over-DOing it!
I am out here trying to LIVE for TOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO many people!
Me!
AND you!
MY PEOPLE!
And yours!